Things We Should Have Learned
From the Worldwide Church of God
By Bob E.
Let's face it. We are all graduates of what Robert Ringer (Winning Through Intimidation) calls, "Screw U", his alternative term for the school of hard knocks. As graduates of "Screw U", hopefully we have become a bit more wary, suspicious,
cynical, and self protective. If not, our entire Worldwide Church of God experience was a total waste! Reading many of the experiences and articles here on this site has triggered a virtual flood of thoughts, both positive and negative regarding my own personal experiences with the cult, and I've identified seven very basic lessons which are worth sharing. Now I know, some of you are probably thinking: "Hey, Bob, seven lessons? Aren't you getting just a little too Herbal?"
Well, yeah! Everything always was seven with him! But we're not saying that there are only seven lessons, or trying to be Biblical numerologists here. Seven has always been my personal lucky number. And, are we not all very lucky not only to have survived the Worldwide Church of God, but also to be stronger so that we cannot be victimized again? In fact, I think that at this point, a moment of silence out of respect for those who didn't make it, is totally appropriate.
Here, then, are the lessons. Take what you need:
1) Any
strength practiced to extreme becomes a weakness. In fact,
there is a clinical psychological term to describe much of
the behavior we learned as part of the Worldwide Church of God. It is called
obsessive-compulsive disorder, and it followed many of us
when we left. Let me demonstrate how it works: Many
people, both male and female, have discovered the long term
and short term benefits of weight training. In proper
balance, this can help one maintain strength throughout life
to perform well at one's place of employment, in bed with a
sexual partner, playing with one's children, with one's
hobbies, etc. A good physical fitness program can prolong
life, instill confidence, and help one avoid illness and
even injury, due to better dexterity. But, suppose one were
to take this to extreme, to lose balance to the point where
his or her entire life were centered around weight training
exclusively. We might expect to see that individual
spending extreme amounts of time at the gym, purchasing
special, expensive foods and vitamin supplements to support
the rigorous activities, not having time for proper balanced
social interaction, limiting social contact to casual
conversations with those met at the gym, and possibly being
too physically tired to perform well at work. With ensuing
job loss, and spending all disposable cash on issues
surrounding body building, perhaps the person's family might
be called upon to support him or her. In fact, soon all
else might be crowded out of that person's life, taking what
in moderate dosages could be beneficial, but practiced to
extremes such as described, actually becoming a liability
not only to the participating individual, but also to those
around him or her.
Now, think of all the many activities we were called upon to practice to extreme in the Worldwide Church of God. Is it any wonder that we were all stuck in a position of perpetual weakness? And, didn't we all assume that to become stronger, we needed to be more diligent, to become even more extreme? Losing one's job due to the Sabbath or Holy Days was fairly commonplace. But, I knew a very successful salesman who found that after becoming part of the WCG, if he continued to spend the proper amounts of time preparing for his work activities to maintain his success, he would not be able to spend the huge amounts of time the church encouraged for personal prayer and Bible Study, and would miss out on the regular WCG Wednesday evening Bible Study held in a city several hours' drive away. He resigned from the profession, losing a company car, and drastically lowering his family's standard of living in the process. He did it willingly, because after all, the WCG fostered an anti-sales mentality, probably to keep us all from realizing that in reality, the ministers were all salesmen (of a grossly defective product), and we were their prospects and customers. His family remained impoverished for as long as I knew them, and he floated from profession to profession.
Remember the exorbitant amount of time required for weekly grocery shopping, because one had to thoroughly read the list of ingredients on every package searching for words such as "pork", or "ham"? There were also the nebulous code words, such as "shortening", which could mean lard, so you couldn't take a chance unless there was a little P in a circle, which stood for the Jewish word Parve, and meant that the product was basically Kosher. We were also proscribed from wearing items of clothing made from mixed materials, in accordance with Old Testament Law. In fact there was a gentleman in the headquarters area who took this so literally, that when he couldn't find white cotton socks without elastic reinforcement, he dutifully removed the elastic from the calves of the socks with his tweezers. He was seen every Sabbath walking around with his socks sagging limply above his shoes, and kept doing so, until the ministers later proclaimed that it was acceptable to mix a natural fiber with a man-made material. The Worldwide Church of God was an organization based on fanatical interpretation of laws, many of them irrational and idiotic. Not only is it easy to trap fanatics in moral dilemmas, because they tend to see all possible choices as either completely right or completely wrong, but, as we've demonstrated, their extreme compulsiveness keeps them in a state of perpetual weakness, which makes them subject to victimization by the very people they are trusting for guidance! Remember our friend "Socks", and be happy that you broke this cycle.
2) Religion
is a very powerful intoxicant. There are certain very good
behavioral patterns common to about 85% of humanity. These
include love for family, drives for stability and self
preservation, pursuit of health and happiness, to name a
few. An intoxicant such as a narcotic, alcohol, power, or
money can cause deviation from these good patterns, in favor
of destructive behavior. A drunk will choose another drink
over helping a friend or relative out of a dire
life-threatening situation. A Worldwide Church of God member, chooses religion
over "carnal" or "worldly" family members. Drunks and
addicts are often very abusive to family or children. WCG
members, intoxicated on religion, frequently beat the crap
out of their kids, and used their wives as a foot wiping
mat, or slave! Addictive personalities always victimize the
financial stabilities of themselves and those close to
them. Those intoxicated on the Worldwide Church of God, gave up financial
stability, their kids' college educations, and retirement
plans to respond to each of HWA's emergency letters. See
the pattern? But it gets worse. Even a drunk or addict
would eventually take his or her child to obtain medical
attention in case of injury or severe illness, but not
someone intoxicated on the WCG! Religious intoxication is
perhaps the most insidious addiction of all. First of all,
who is going to believe that it even exists, let alone
condemn it as evil and recommend treatment? Then, how do
you treat it? Do you treat it as you would treat some
addictions, with a 12 step program, total abstinence, and
surrender to a higher power? Ooohhh, watch those last two
words, aren't those the ones that got us into trouble? So
maybe we treat it as we would an eating disorder. You need
food for sustenance, so you are forced to learn moderation.
But, Herbert W. Armstrong time-bombed you. If you practiced his religion in
moderation, didn't he then brand you as Laodecean? That is
why the greatest number of those exiting this abominable
cult practice total abstinence from religion. When I tried
to explain this once to a minister from another faith, he
literally broke down and cried, and marveled at how Satan
had been so effective in actually killing the whole concept
of religion for a great number of people! Another pitfall
for those with addictive personalities is that of replacing
one addiction with another seemingly less destructive
addiction. I've known people who, upon discovering that the
WCG is a fraud, have joined the Church of Scientology or one
of the Pentecostal holy roller churches!
3) Question
authority. The WCG had its own version of this. They
wanted us to prove all things. Unfortunately, their game
plan was that you would read their materials, become
brainwashed, regurgitate their teachings back to a minister
convincingly enough for him to baptize you, and then switch
off your mind and simply blindly accept everything they
dished out thereafter. There is a word for such a person
who does this, and it's not "converted" as the Worldwide Church of God so
quaintly put it. The word is, once again, victim!
Hopefully we have all learned to question arbitrary
authority, to hold authority figures accountable, and to be
very careful of the amount of intrusion we allow them to
have into our lives. When one person claims he or she hears
voices, a medical practitioner, upon establishing that there
are no voices, diagnoses that person to be schizophrenic, a
serious form of mental illness. That is, unless the patient
is a minister, and claims that the voice is that of Jesus
Christ! Once he tells you that, society gives him a pass!
In apostolic times, the messenger was generally validated by
paranormal occurrences. In modern times, apparently the
closest such occurrence with mass witnesses was in the early
part of the century, and is now known as the miracle at
Fatima. Regardless of whether or not you believe in the
miracle at Fatima, in which the Virgin Mary purportedly
spoke with two young Portuguese girls in front of their
entire town, I certainly don't know anyone who ever
witnessed paranormal occurrences to support Herbert W. Armstrong's claims
that he was God's end time messenger and/or apostle. During
his life, the only background information we had on him came
from his own autobiography, and that might possibly have
never changed, if the prophecies God had supposedly inspired
him to make had actually come to pass. Their nearly
complete failure caused the inevitable questions, and
interviews of those present during his germination period in
the Church of God, Seventh Day. If his background had been
a matter of public knowledge early on, those who do question
authority would have been spared some really unfortunate
experiences. But, even today, he is blindly revered by many
in the sub-cults, most of whom have been confronted with the
truth, yet willingly practice denial. In contrast, the one
surviving sister from the Fatima experience, today a nun in
the Catholic Church, was 100% accurate in the prophecies
which were allegedly revealed to her.
4) Random
circumstances happen to everyone. By labeling these as
blessings or cursings, the WCG made the recipients
personally responsible for whatever happened to them, even
if it was something blatantly non-Karmic, and totally beyond
their control. One used to hear laughable methods of
explaining this away, as the time someone unashamedly
proclaimed
that God was blessing them by allowing Satan to curse them so they could recognize and correct a character flaw. How absurd! Ministers were never able to credibly explain why there was no difference between the ways in which a worldly person was blessed or cursed, and the way church members were blessed or cursed. You couldn't make a case that WCG members were protected from disease, poverty, or accidents any differently than, let's say, a Catholic or Presbyterian. WCG members often fared worse! Members frequently died from totally treatable maladies, lost their jobs, businesses, and farms due to various church beliefs, and died in horrible car crashes enroute to compulsory attendance at remote Feast Sites to which they could barely afford to travel in old, ratted out, unsafe automobiles. If there were any measurable difference in favor of Worldwide Church of God members, it would be that they were incarcerated at a lower rate, due to adherence to the spirit and letter of virtually every imaginable law. That is not a bad thing. But, the lesson here is that "Shit Happens!" to everybody. The successful people are those who confront and deal with it, instead of waiting for some imaginary external force to take it away.
5) A
situation which starts out bad generally becomes much
worse. By the time the tragedy occurred in Jonestown,
Guyana, I had been away from the WCG for several years.
Initially, I wondered whether Jim Jones might possibly be a
WCG pastor in South or Central America. While there were
many extremely close parallels, my fears proved unfounded .
What had concerned me the most was that amongst the WCG
faithful, Petra was always held out to be a special place.
It was where we were to receive our final training before
Christ's return. Having watched for years as justice based
on gossip, innuendo, and hearsay evidence which would never
hold up in a court of law, was dispensed by the Worldwide Church of God, I
suffered no such illusion. Petra would not be a place where
a brother first confronted a brother, then repeated the
process in front of a witness, then ultimately took it to a
minister, all else having failed, who with Solomon's wisdom,
would mete out an equitable resolution. I knew that at
"God's West Point", students out and out ratted, and
unsubstantiated allegations frequently appeared as fact on
disciplinary reports which, when treated credibly, had
serious impact on people's lives. The ministers, who wanted
you to believe that everything which they did was inspired
by God, obviously lacked the divine ability to determine the
truthfulness of the allegations. So, to me, this, combined
with the reinstitution of Old Testament Law, would make
Petra a place where lot's of people got stoned, and I do not
mean in a pleasant recreational way! Lesson: if it looks
bad in the beginning, get the hell out, and run, don't
walk. If you are a reader, who happens to be a member of
one of the WCG splinter groups, you may want to very
carefully reconsider the wisdom of spending 3-1/2 years in a
place of "safety" presided over by Gerald Flurry, David
Pack, or Rod Meredith. At least at Garner Ted's place of
safety the massages (with optional masturbation!) will be
good!
6) Self
denial works best when practiced voluntarily, not under
coercion. This is why there is so much bitterness among
former WCG members! Supposing an amazing hypnotist was
leading you thru some acrobatic tricks which you would not
and could not perform in your normal state of
consciousness. While performing a trick, you lost control,
fell off the stage, broke your back, and became a
paraplegic. Your angst and bitterness would be centered on
the fact that you had given full control to another,
assuming that he had your best interests in mind, but that
because he was proven unreliable, you would pay the
consequences for the duration of your life. In fact, if
someone you have come to trust as your religious or
spiritual leader persuades you to do something extreme and
permanent, such as mortgage your home to finance yet another
"gun lap", and you later discover that the one you trusted
is in reality an incestuous old fraud who literally
plagiarized the religion which he has taught you, after
having been defrocked by the church which had originally
ordained him, you might become just a little bitter. Isn't
it strange, the sheer number of people who became bitter as
a result of exposure to the WCG? A veritable epidemic! Now,
contrast this with Henry David Thoreau, who separated
himself from civilization, and went to live in a box at
Walden Pond, eating only what he could pick and catch. He
wrote a book chronicling his ascetic experiences. So what
was to be bitter about? In Thoreau's case, it was all
self-imposed. Ergo, it's not the self-denial that makes
ex-Worldwide Church of God people bitter, it's that that self-denial was induced
by the fraud and deception of people who actually knew
better, and avoided suffering the pain themselves.
7)
Compassion for minorities. Because of some of the
situations chronicled by my good friend John B, in his
excellent article, "Catch 111", most of us know very well
how it felt to be ostracized by people we admired, to have
been held back from opportunities, and often to have been
viewed as pariahs. We were a pseudo-minority! I, for one,
appreciated it very much the few times when others helped
extricate me from various situations of peer-imposed
helplessness. The lesson from the help offered by others,
often at personal cost, has remained with me for many
years. This White Boy is not your typical Casper. I have
great empathy for persecuted people from all backgrounds,
and will not hesitate to use my strengths to defend others
who are being unfairly singled out and maligned. There was
a truly great movie filmed during the '70's, called "Billy
Jack", which dealt with this subject very eloquently, and
re-shaped public perception of what our interactions with
those different from ourselves could be. We are all of the
same race, the human race. Now that human DNA has been
mapped, a leading geneticist has postulated that there is
not adequate biological difference to support the theory
that there are separate races. We are all that similar!
If we were cats, you as a Siamese cat would not have
different needs than I, as, let's say a Tabby. As humans,
we all get up in the morning looking forward to a new day,
and greet the day with similar emotions. Our needs and
goals are similar. The same things hurt us or make us
happy. Unfortunately, we are all confronted by what police
officers refer to as "Adam Henries" (assholes, to those with
no cops as friend or relative) from time to time, who would
use how we look, what we are, or what we believe as
justification for their acts of bigotry. Each of us has an
opportunity to be part of the problem, or part of the
solution. Empathy and compassion, walking a mile in the
other guy's moccasins, makes the world a better place.
Someone once said that the more painful the learning experience, the more lasting the effect. The lessons enumerated above are priceless. I thank Herbert W. Armstrong and his cast of merry pranksters for the education, but not for the unnecessary pain. Fortunately, pain and bitterness diminish with the passage of time. Strength replaces them. Being a victim is never fun, but with what we've learned, we really are in a better position to deal with life's problems and disappointments than others who have no idea who Herbert W. Armstrong was, or what the WCG was all about. That is our lemonade! For those who have just left one of the splinter groups, and feel despondent, remember, others have gone before you. No, it's not easy, this new odyssey on which you have embarked. A true survivor doesn't concern himself or herself with the past, it's gone, and there's nothing you can do about it. A true survivor is not overly concerned about the future, because it has not happened yet. A true survivor remembers that today is the first day of the rest of his or her life! And, now that you've broken the cycle, life is good!
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